Does Acne Make You Ugly? Struggling With Relationships When You’re Self-Conscious in Your Skin
When I was a teenager, my acne-riddled skin was extremely dry and flaky. By the end of the school day, I’d lick my hand and wipe it on my face to try and hide the dry patches with a little emergency moisture. It was dumb and bizarre, but I didn’t know anything about skincare and never carried any lotions or creams. Seized with panic that someone would notice my flaky complexion, what else could I do?
One day, I tried to sneakily perform this move while standing around with some friends. It wasn’t that subtle — like a cat licking its paw to clean its ear. Immediately, one of them said,
“Did you just rub spit on your face?”
It was, of course, the boy I’d been in love with for three years. Because who else would be there to witness my utter humiliation?
“Uh, no,” I said, staring like he was the stupid one.
The conversation moved on and everyone else probably forgot about it, but I went home to quietly die of shame for the next two decades. That day, I realized that having a crush while struggling with acne was not all it was cracked up to be.
And that was only the beginning.
We all want to feel beautiful, especially in front of a romantic interest. But navigating relationships when we’re self-conscious in our skin is a minefield. We overthink things, hold ourselves back, and torture ourselves with endless, petrifying questions.
- Is my face shiny?
- Is it dry?
- Can they see my acne?
- Do they think I’m repulsive?
You’re not the first person to ask, “Is acne unattractive?” and then torment yourself with years of shame and doubt.
Let’s be clear: acne doesn’t make you ugly. But it’s difficult to maintain a thriving, healthy romance when one corner of your mind is always hung up on your skin. Acne tries to control us with paralyzing anxiety and self-doubt, wrecking our confidence and tricking us into sabotaging our relationships.
For example, my gorgeous friend Shiloh spent her entire teens hiding in the depths of a pulled-up hoodie, trying to cut herself off from the world. She was afraid to connect with people or draw attention to herself because her blemishes and acne scars made her feel less than others. She didn’t try dating for years.
As she can attest, there’s no “enjoying the moment” with the specter of acne hanging overhead. Instead, we’re left hanging in limbo — bearing our acne like a burden and waiting to bloom like the girl in one of those ugly duckling Hollywood movies. Specifically, waiting for our “real lives” to begin.
Meanwhile, our internal monologue optimistically begs us,
“Just keep holding on! You’ll feel so confident and gorgeous when your skin finally clears!”
Okay, but what if it never clears?
“Ugly Acne” Traps Us All in Our Insecurities
I waited and waited, but my ugly duckling transformation never magically appeared. Every relationship in my 20s suffered as a result.
Did bad skin follow you into adulthood, too? Then you know how it is. Crippled with insecurity, you spend every relationship just waiting for your partner to get a better, prettier offer and leave you in the dust. The trust issues are real.
You end up keeping partners at arm’s length, hiding parts of your personality just as you try to hide your skin under cakey cosmetics. And the makeup is a must — after all, how could you go without it? They’d see you.
But all this hiding has a rippling effect on relationships, translating into emotional distance. How many times has a partner called you beautiful, only for you to blow it off with a roll of your eyes? You bitterly wonder,
Why give me a compliment that is such an obvious lie? How am I supposed to believe that?
Or someone reaches out to stroke your face, and you flinch away before they notice the sandpapery texture of your skin.
They’ll feel my bumps and be disgusted.
One friend of mine became a compulsive skin-picker. She’d poke and prod her complexion in the bathroom mirror, secretly squeeze pores at her work desk, and absently run fingertips across her face while watching TV. She felt like she couldn’t control herself, anxiously driven to force the impurities from her skin.
But then she’d be left scrambling to cover the blotchy, irritated signs of her picking from her boyfriend. She kept her face angled away or rearranged her hair to cover the glaring redness, even hunching down into scarves to hide her inflamed jawline.
Her relationship became shadowed by a familiar mantra you’ve heard in your mind:
Don’t look at me.
Changing Your Troubled Skin Narrative
Here’s the thing. Your skin doesn’t have to be flawless for you to be beautiful or find love. I guarantee that you’re beautiful right now, even if you can’t bring yourself to believe it yet.
But I’ve been where you are. I know it’s not as easy as telling yourself, “I love every part of myself, and so will a romantic partner!” Sometimes, you need a boost to help push your thinking in a more positive direction.
For me, a turning point came that revitalized my relationship with my skin and my husband. For once in my life, I found skincare that worked for my temperamental skin:
Averr Aglow’s Clear Skin Kit.
I was drawn in by Kit’s simple approach. It doesn’t waste time on surface-level blemishes. Instead, it’s crafted with natural minerals and botanicals that dive deep to nourish and heal your skin from within. Cautiously optimistic, I read all of Kit’s instructions and committed myself to follow them to the letter.
Each morning, I spritzed my sleepy face with the enchanting floral face mist and then freshened up my complexion with the rinseless cleanser. I’d finish with a layer of the Kit’s thick, balmy moisturizer, which kept me hydrated throughout the day.
In the evening, I’d buff away impurities with another round of the cleanser and then treat my skin to deep detoxification with Kit’s dreamy overnight mask.
It didn’t take long to see results.
First, I noticed that my blemishes were smaller and disappeared much faster than before. Then, it seemed like my skin tone was getting brighter and more even. Was it wishful thinking? I didn’t want to get overexcited, but soon I found myself wearing less and less makeup. Even my husband noticed the change.
“Your skin is looking really good,” he told me. And you know what? I believed him.
After three months of using Averr Aglow, four years of marriage, and 20 long years of hiding, I finally felt confident enough to show my makeup-free face.
Happily Averr After
With the right skincare, you can rewrite your whole love story.
Before, I’d all but given up on my complexion. Now, with the Clear Skin Kit in my corner, I’ve found the courage to hope again. My skin keeps improving, and so does my confidence!
I still use the Clear Skin Kit every single day, and my skin has never been smoother or softer. I no longer recoil when my husband caresses my cheek, and I’m not living in constant fear of my terrible skin.
Adjusting my self-image (and skin image) is still an ongoing process, but with Averr Aglow’s help, I’ve made incredible strides. And I know it will keep getting better!
You can have the same happy ending — whether you’re in a committed relationship, looking for love, or simply trying to heal your wounded self-esteem. Caring for your skin is such an empowering experience, especially when you realize that results are actually within your grasp.
You deserve skincare that truly values and cherishes your unique skin. So if you need help embracing your complexion and to believe in your incredible worth, try the Clear Skin Kit. It can change your skin, yes. But it can also change your outlook, your relationships, and your life.